Dear Yelpers,
Stop trying so hard to be funny. You are not. Please just get to the point about why you like/dislike a business and be done with it.
Most of the times you forget to do this simple task because you are too busy delusionally overestimating your try-hard sense of humor in a feeble attempt to win intarwebz-friendz.
If Yelp had a dislike/bury button, it would become apparent what the non-hipster-douchebags really think of your contrived drivel that took you 2 hours to write.
Ignorance sure is bliss, isn’t it?
4 stars for Yelp, -1 stars for Yelpers.